A little bit more than weird

Okay, so i have been slightly less than honest.
It has been recently brought to my attention that not telling the whole truth is the same thing as lying. In that case, Ive got some explaining to do. I need, as a person, to be as much of an open book as possible. I always have been and i have always wanted the people around me to be the same. Not being completely transparent to the people that you care about isn't fair to them and if I was close to someone going through what i have been going through, out of curiosity and concern, i would want them to be able to speak freely with me.
Big deep breaths.
Presley is a little bit more than weird.
We have known for several years now that Presley has severe hyper-active impulsive type ADHD. Hell, anybody that's ever met him could pick up on that one. Last year our behaviorist pointed out some things that looked like early OCD (obsessive and compulsive disorder) and ODD (oppositional defiance disorder). These are all things that i can handle, not that big of a deal.. Really it sounds like more than it is. Fast forward to 6 months ago we moved here to Pensacola and started seeing a new child psychologist, who is wonderful. She met Presley and reviewed all of his medical records, met me and went over our entire family history and we discussed Presley's behaviors. There are some things that i always thought were a little strange but have been repeatedly reassured by pediatricians that they were all very normal, lots of kids rock back and forth.. sure.. Things like Presley putting his puzzles together with his eyes closed. Presley's bizarre breathing habits. The fact that Presley could name every state, find its place on a map and name its capital at two years old. Presley's rituals, obsessions, fears, likes and dislikes. His sensitivities (bright lights, strong taste, weird textures, weird sounds and things out of his routine).. It was after this that our new doctor said the words Ive been wondering when i was going to hear since Pres was about a year old.
Asperger's syndrome
Its so weird how something can not bother you when you just suspect it but when someone else points it out to you it can knock the wind out of you.
The more questions she asked and the more questions i answered the more obvious it became, that this is Presley.

And i feel terrible for letting something that belongs to him, bother me so much. After all its just a name right? Presley is still Presley. Hes still the same kid he was 6 months ago right?

I think i have gone through every emotion a Mom can go through over this. From being horrified of what his life might be like to being sure that i had convinced myself of this and really, hes fine, hes normal.. In the words of Mama Gump "what is normal anyway?".
Denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. I think I've sat in a pool of each in the last 6 months. I'm not real sure where i stand now.. I guess I'm pretty close to acceptance because I'm writing this.. Writing it makes it real..

We will get the official diagnosis and where he stands with other nuero typical kids and other Aspies when we get in to see the pediatric nuero psychologist (cant believe that's even a real job) in about 6 months. Why 6 months you ask? Because there aren't that many pediatric nuero psychologist and thats how long it takes to get in to see this doc..

Hes still Presley. Still the same vibrating box of words hes always been.. Just today he came to tattle on River and he did so by saying "Mom, could you please tell River to stop being confrontational".. Somewhere between typical 4 year old and brilliant genius my child lies..

I guess i am getting into acceptance because I'm starting to realize that this isn't a curse and James and i must be the luckiest parents in the world to have such amazing children, one of which is just a little bit more than weird..